You made up your mind. You don't want me in your life. It's over. It's time to focus on myself. It's time to give myself all that love I was trying to give to you. It's time I give myself the attention you never deserved.
It was very unexpected. A phone call I was definitely not expecting, a disruption to my laid back stay-at-home activities I did not plan on, a night I was not prepared for. Normally, I would have said 'no thanks, I'm good, I have work early in the morning'. I usually did. I never liked spending… Continue reading The Night We Met
I miss you. I fucking miss you.
Hello crossroads, we meet again. I decided that I should explore all of my feelings and the reasoning behind them before you decide you want to talk, so consider this an open letter for you and for myself. So, James. Here I am, once again confused, once again unsure, once again lost, because even though… Continue reading Set Sail
I began writing this while sitting out in public, but about three sentences in, began crying and shaking uncontrollably. I wanted to stop and just delete all of it, it hurts too much thinking about it and reliving it and I feel my heart shattering piece by piece once again the more I write. But… Continue reading Million Reasons
I'm... okay. I left my house today. After 48 hours, I finally ate something. The void, the emptiness, the panic is still there, I am still in pieces. But I'm strong. And nobody breaks me, not even you. I'm completely shattered, but there's only recovery from now on, things only get better from now on.… Continue reading Void.
This won't be like the usual posts because I don't feel alive right now. I feel empty. I feel vacant. I feel alone. There is a numbness like I've never felt before. There's a void. Panic attacks are the closest I am to feeling anything, they mostly feel like the emptiness trying to come out… Continue reading Empty.